War on tourist
by crackhunter
Summary: Burt fights an army of tourist


Disclaimer: I Don't own tremor the series or any of its characters so go sue someone else, ha  
  
"It's been seven long days and I have no idea were we are going Seth," said Jackie who [i]Was aimisly shuffling through CD's, "I told you, Jackie, we are not going anywhere we are wandering around aimisly kind of like how you're searching those CD's." "Why?" asked Jackie "Because we have seventy Billion dollars and nothing to do." "And?" "We have to find some thing to do because there is no point in winning fifteen poker tournaments and then having nothing to do with the money." "O.K. point made." Jackie a young girl of 19 flipped her short blond hair. Her newspaper pajamas reading "the daily Banana" stood out against the dark leather interior of the car. Seth, her friend, a male with slightly shorter hair also blond, is in comic book pajamas. They are driving down the highway in a '97 Pontiac firebird with a neon glow radiated underneath the car. They ride past a sign that says Welcome to Perfection. "Hey Jackie this town sounds neat." "Why?" "Perfection" "Oh! Lets stop if you see a general store." "Here's one." "STOOOOOP." "Stopping stopping." Jackie and Seth walk into the general store "Deux un mountain dew." "Um, excuse me but I'm not sure what you said "Deux un mountain dew." Jodi walks back and gets a mountain dew "Deux" said Jackie holdings up two fingers. "Oh sorry." She gets another one. "Merci." "Geoges ca'va?" "Zut ca'va mal. Et toi?" "Ca'va bien." Burt walks in the door "bonjour, Monsieur. Comment allez-vous ?" Asked Jackie and Seth when Burt walked in "oh great tourist. DO YOOOOOUUUU SPEEEEK EEENNNGGGLLLIIIISH???" Questioned Burt "oh yeah of coarse sorry forgot not the entire world speaks French." "Uh Jackie don't we have a test right about now" "oh crude." Jackie and Seth run out to their car and grabs two laptops Jackie hands one to Seth and they start hooking the computers gadgets together. "Seth what's the web site?" "Ucla/french101.edu" "O.K. time for the not so fun part." Jackie and Seth buckle down and work on their test occasionally sharing answers. About halfway threw their test Tyler came wandering in for his later than usual coffee. "Kind of up late today Tyler." Said Jodi "Can you keep it down this test is starting to get hard." Said Jackie "Tourist?" asked Tyler "Yeah." "Hey wait a sec. I know who you are; you're the world poker tournament champions. I saw you last night on the news." "Here" said Jackie slamming a five hundred on the counter "you can keep the change if you get these two to shut up so we can finish are test." "You have been doing that test for the past three hours" said Burt. "Well it is a seven-hundred question test." After this Burt and Tyler shut up but in another ten minuets Nancy walked in "hey guy's what's." "Shuuu" yelled Burt "why?" Burt pointed to Jackie screen which now said, "You are now entering part 40 of your test you will have 4 questions please mark the best answer." The same thing happened when Rosealeta and Twitchal came in. soon the entire town was watching as Jackie and Seth took their French test. "Thank God I'm finally done said Jackie as she closed her computer. Seth did the same after a few moments. " Thank God it's finally over," said Tyler and Burt. A round of soda on me said Seth "No thanks." Said Burt "I've got to get back to my life." "Now wait just a second there Gummer we have things to discuss." Said Twichel "If it's another one of those scientist I don't want to hear about, then don't tell me about them." "Well actually the department wants someone to move in with you and someone with Tyler, something about stress and you and El Blanco. and whatever. just do you know anyone who might want to live with you?" "No." "Wait Burt I've got an Idea" said Tyler "what." Said Burt obviously annoyed. "How about them?" he points to Jackie and Seth "yeah sure I want some annoying French speakers living with me." "What's wrong with French?" "Nothing if you're a nerd." Said Burt "come on Burt give e'm a chance." "Fine." "Jackie you get Burt." "Yes I got the cute one." Jackie said her face immediately turning red "whoops did I say that out loud?" Burt's face also turned red "sorry Tyler no offence." "None taken." Said Tyler with a smirk that Jackie didn't care for. "Hey Burt I'll see you at six tonight." "Affirmative I will see you at base at eighteen hundred hours." Replied Burt "um what's base and eighteen hundred hours?" asked Nancy "well when Burt is conversing about base it means his bunker when I say bunker I mean my house, room, or wherever I'm staying, in this case Tyler's and eighteen hundred hours is standard military time for six o' clock." Explained Seth "o.k."said Nancy leaving the store with one thought in mind "NERDS"  
  
*duex un mountain dew = 2 mountain dews *Merci = thank you * Georges cava? = George how are you *Zut cava mal! = Darn I'm doing horrible * Bonjour, Monsieur. Comment allez-vous ? = Hello sir how are you?  
  
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